


Muffin Deserves All the Pets

by GingerAnn



Series: GingerAnn Challenges Herself [35]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Humor, everyone makes bad decisions in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:13:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27905776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GingerAnn/pseuds/GingerAnn
Summary: ‘I met you last night when you were drunkenly patting my dog in my backyard at 3 in the morning and when I asked you what the hell you were doing you slurred something about dogs being great and then you threw up on my feet and then fifteen minutes later you were passed out on my couch so that’s why you’re here right now also what the fuck is your name and why were you patting a dog in a stranger’s backyard in the middle of the night’ AU
Series: GingerAnn Challenges Herself [35]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1996009
Kudos: 8





	Muffin Deserves All the Pets

Eliza heard Muffin bark from outside. It was dark, but not late, and Muffin could come and go as he pleased, so him barking concerned Eliza enough to go see what was going on.

Eliza stepped out on the patio to see a man sitting in the yard, giving her dog belly rubs.

“Can I help you?” Eliza asked.

“Oh! You do have an owner!” The man said looking from her to Muffin.

Muffin jumped up and wagged his tail.

“Now, you said you were going without proper pets and I felt obligated to help you. But here you have been lying to me,” the man continued.

Eliza smiled as she walked over to him. Muffin was a good judge of character, and if he didn’t mind this man, it was probably safe enough. Even if he did smell like a brewery.

Eliza opened her mouth to ask him what his name was but was cut off by him vomiting on the ground next to her feet.

She jumped to the side, avoiding the mess.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I… I think I drank a bit too much,” he said looking up at her.

“Looks and smells like you might be right. Would you like some water, that might help?” Eliza said.

“Oh, I shouldn’t. I mean… I don’t want to impose. I’m already petting your dog.”

“And the dog is a mother hen. If you don’t come in and have some water, he will bother me all night about how I just left you to die in a ditch,” Eliza said. 

“Uh... Okay… Thank you,” the man said.

Eliza helped him to his feet and then guided him into the small house she shared with her best friend. She situated him on the couch, then went into the kitchen. By the time she returned he was passed out on the couch. She tossed a blanket over him. 

“He’s your problem,” she said looking at Muffin.

“Did your dog bring home a stray?” Zevran asked finally emerging from his bedroom.

“He did. Think it’s safe?” Eliza asked looking at him.

“If he tries anything, Muffin will eat him. Won’t you, you glorious hound?” Zevran asked looking at Muffin.

Muffin barked once then sat next to the couch. 

****

Eliza woke up the next day to a shriek. She ran out of her room, meeting Zevran in the hallway, and to the living room. Where they found Muffin now laying across the drunk man from the previous night.

“Oh, Muffin’s new pet is awake,” Zevran said.

“Uh… What?” The man said. 

“Hi. I’m Eliza, this is Zevran, and that 200-pound lapdog sitting on you right now is Muffin. Last night, he, the dog, apparently told you he got no pets so you decided that needed to be remedied. Then you threw up on my feet and passed out,” Eliza said.

“Oh. Oh. I am so sorry,” the man said.

“No need for apologies,” Eliza said.

“This is really the most interesting thing that has happened to us in months,” Zevran added.

“So, what’s your name?” Eliza asked.

“Oh. Alistair. I… I went out with some friends last night. Decided to walk home. Not my greatest idea,” he said.

“I don’t know. Muffin thinks it was a great idea,” Eliza said.

The dog let out a happy bark.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Tumblr](https://gingerann.tumblr.com/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/GingerAnn23).
> 
> Check out the series page for more information about the whole challenge thing…


End file.
